Memories

 Months ago we had a game night with some dear friends and their family.  They brought several games to play.  One particular game was a bit of an eye opening experience.  I can't remember what the game is called but basic idea is as follows.  Everyone has a tile and marker to write their answer.  Someone asks a question and you write your answer down as a % to which you agree with the statement/question then without seeing other people's answers, you put yours down in order of least to greatest.  Ok that was a weird explanation.  The real result that was surprising came with the questions "How important are family traditions?"  My kids wrote their percentages down and put them clear at the beginning of the row.  Meaning they didn't think anyone could think family traditions were less important than they felt.  

Sure enough, they put 0% importance on family traditions and simply said that they didn't think we had any.  Now all the adults were feeling a bit bad for me because they were even aware of all the things I try to do around holidays.  I wasn't sad.  Honest.  I was just surprised that all the work I put into the various activities were really not all that important to them.  I actually had bumped into someone's opinion instagram post that suggested doing a poll with your kiddos before major family holidays about expected fun and food that made things feel special for them.  I confess that I will still do activities for the various holidays because it brings me joy.  But glad to know that I really don't have any pressure from the kids to make things magical for them.  So, today for example, I didn't do my usual learn about Martin Luther King Jr activities and food.  We just had a good conversation about why they didn't have school and the price many had to pay to try and get kind treatment.

For Christmas, since all of my kids are non Santa believers, I went back to the idea of the kids buying gifts for their siblings doing a random draw.  Mia took it a step further and purchased gifts for everyone.  But the kids thought that was all Christmas was going to be.  Meanwhile, I had been painting and building various Christmas characters out of all the boxes coming to our home prior to Christmas.  I had an idea that stemmed from last Christmas's opening game.  Last year, I wrapped each person's gifts in the same wrapping paper.  Everyone had their own print but there was no names written on the gifts.  Instead, they each got their own scavenger hunt to find their wrapping paper.  My favorite scavenger hunt was the one I found for Fernando.  He had clips of words from famous Christmas songs that lead to another clue.  You could hear him singing around the house desperately trying to figure out the correct missing word.  

It was also a bit of a trick because for Christmas itself we had flown to Costa Rica which had its own fun delays and sicknesses etc.  We came home in time for New Years and I did my tradition of New Year's tree with activities.  I love watching the kids get excited for what each other gets. 

Anyway, back to Christmas 2023.  After we did the kid gifts exchange, my parents came over for the day.  They are currently serving a mission in Alaska and live in Wasilla which is about 45 mins away.  They had a cute gift that my mom made.  These cute little gnomes that she hand kitted.  They looked incredible.  The last gift under the tree was a simple Christmas bag with a silly poem I wrote and QR code to the Left Right story. 

POEM:

Your sibling gifts were magical! it’s fun to give And get 

Surprise It doesn’t have to end. I hope you didn’t fret

But of course we haven’t made it easy so listen up my sweets

Some Christmas friends helped hide your things Each one with challenge you must complete

This starts it off with all of you gathered round from young to old

Those envelops have clues you’ll need listen to the rules and story as it unfolds 

 

The link went to One Simple Party' blog.  I had everyone get in a circle Oldest to Youngest.  I had gifts for my parents so I had my mom stand in for me and so I could read the story.  I handed an envelop to everyone in the circle and started the story.  This story had the unique direction of "all around". The all around cue meant everyone gave their envelop to the person across from them. I can't tell you how many times I drew a diagram starting with one person to find out where that envelop would end up. It looked like one of Javi's mazes he loves to do.  I tried it so many times and with some many different starting positions.  And I still was nervous.  It went off without a hitch, but I still double checked.  Now that everyone had their correct envelop, we had a clue to search for the first Christmas character.  

First off was a reindeer.  Ok, use some imagination and think about designing things with just cardboard boxes.  Don't think about all the creative work people have done with cardboard.  I felt like the inversion of the boxes to avoid needing to cover up the various amazon or Walmart logo placement was enough extra effort.  The head had a game of ring toss. The winners got to open their presents first.

 

After the game and presents, they found a clue that took them to the garage to find a ginger bread house.  The front door opened to a small box inside the big box. It was full of brown bags painted like ginger bread houses.  There were random treats (including oranges) or a post it notes.  Some even had $ hidden under the treat.  

The game was inspired by this post on Facebook.  They had numbered bags (like seen above) and numbers in a cupcake pan.  I added the bonus of colored stickers and colored ping pong balls.  Everyone got two tries per turn.  If you got the same colored ping pong ball into a space that had a matching colored number, you got to look at the number bag you landed on and decide to keep it or randomly select another bag.  It was surprisingly hard to get the balls into spaces for me, but everyone else seemed to do it rather well.  After the game and presents, they were led to the guest room to find the snowman.  

I felt pretty proud about the hat having a book for the rim of the hat.  The top part of the hat had the game.  We had to scoop "snowball" cotton balls into a container but used the scarf to make it hard to see.  It was so funny to watch.  I went last so I got the advantage of seeing the best way to go about it.  

After this game and present opening, the clue led us to the game room.  This particular character had no game to play because all the gifts were games to play together including the track.  The track box had a new backboard for our indoor basketball game that had been busted by some slam dunks. We also had some board games: Oh no! Volcano, El Dorado (or Dorito as Javi calls it), Kites.  There was also
a diamond Christmas picture, and Mario Wonder Switch Game.

Finally behind the couch there was the candle.  The flame had Pictionary Air.  I custom made some cards that had various Christmasy clues.  With the stylus, people took turns drawing their clues in the air while everyone else tried to guess what they were drawing.  The catch is the person drawing can't see the screen.  The stylus casts the light drawings onto the screen.  

It was a lot work planning, making sure the correct gifts were in the correct characters, hiding the characters (ok, that was easy since I always do stuff like this for my church callings. The kids just assumed it was for activity day boys), and then having them ready Christmas morning without drawing attention to them.  I loved it so much.  It spread the Christmas fun for most of the day.  We only had two hours to clean up and get the space ready for our Christmas Dance.  This year we invited two families to join us.  Mia did the food.  Fernando put together the play list that builds to a climax song and even has an interpretive dance moment.  I sent my parents to the USO to deliver the baked goods we made for the airman who couldn't go home for the holiday.  Magically things were ready to go at the designated party time.  There were treat and finger foods galore.  Super impressive since Mia had 4 wisdom teeth removed a week prior.  

 

Regrets

 I have been looking back over the years and regret not keeping up with our family blog.  So many memories lost to me.  I even read some of these posts and look at the pictures and still don't remember being apart of the memory listed.  So I'll attempt it again.  10 years later.  We added a kid since the last post and had another move on to college with another about to follow.  

Fernando is the Bishop of the Mt Baldy Ward and has been since right before the big Covid 19 moment took as all for an interesting loop of events.  It's to the point where people have asked how long he's been in and whether or not he is ready to move on. Although it isn't super great having him gone, I feel like we have been training for this moment our whole married life.  Medical school did a great job at training me for flying solo. 

Mia is finishing up her final year of college and in her internship phase of her business major.  I always thought that art or design or sewing would be her choice of major.  But in true Mia fashion, she discovered her own passion and path and is getting it done.

Tiago is finishing is final semester at the Middle College.  I keep trying to convince him to take a few more courses to save himself time and money later but parents aren't known for knowing anything until there is a chance to look back and reflect.  He has been accepted to University of Hawaii but is thinking of staying for a year our local University of Alaska. He is doing varsity basketball again.  I am impressed with the drive he has to continue with Basketball although the team is still waiting to get a win.

Talia is working on juggling a lot of talents in music.  She is the ward organist.  She has taught a few kids  on violin, viola, and currently piano.  She made it into Swing/Varsity choir.  She arranges music and has picked up playing the guitar.  This year we decided to homeschool to work on prioritizing school assignments to give her a fighting chance to get into Middle College.  She also is trying to learn Spanish.

Joaquin started middle school and has loved being in his English class.  He also really enjoyed his mysteries in history class.  He has been in orchestra but doesn't really care about playing the cello.  We have hopes that he will finally make it into a season of basketball without breaking something.  For the the past 3 seasons, he broke something right before  practices really even began.  He broke his foot once at school trying to jump and touch the rim of the basketball hoop.  He broke his hand during a practice.  and broke his thumb doing something else.  

Javier is our only one in Elementary school.  He has hearing aids that he wore diligently but then got out of the habit. He loves listening to books.  His most favorite books are the I survived Series, books about animals, How to Train your Dragon series, and practically any book about history.  He is always learning facts and sharing them with us.  He loves his oldest sister and spending time together as a family.  He has decided that Santa is not really based on logic.  

Myself.  I actually look at my life and wonder how I am here.  How am I now 43 and have kids moving on with their lives.  I have often wondered what my next steps are going to be.  Either way, hopefully I will be better at up keeping this for my own viewing pleasure.

Today I gave a talk over zoom to a church branch in our Stake.  Such a funny thing to do.  I was asked last minute because I agreed to put my name on a list of those willing to help speak in the various alaskan branches.  Years ago, I was in CA with my in laws at their branch during Fast and Testimony Sunday.  I kept thinking how weird it would be to have to give and listen to the same 10+ people every week.  When I came to Alaska and saw the small branches, I vowed I would always be willing to be a speaker as needed just for the people to get a break.  

I was asked to give my thought about the LDS General Conference talk by Elder Cook in Oct 2020 entitled Hearts knit in righteousness and unity.  I receive the text Saturday after I had finished my morning shift as a temple worker and while I was at my son's girlfriend's swim meet.  I already planned to take my youngest to the swimming pool and bowling with his friend.  Not wanting to refuse, I agreed and just hoped that I could come up with something.  Thank heavens I had to give a lot of talks while serving as the 1st Counselor in the Stake Young Women's organization that I could find a previous talk that was about the same idea.  I shifted a few words around and because it was via zoom, I could prop my phone on my laptop and read my talk and reference Elder Cook's talk pretty seamlessly.  My talk ended in just enough time to take Joaquin and Talia to church for their responsibilities as the new Deacon's president and the ward organist respectively.  I let Talia drive them down last week (illegally since she is still only 15 and on her provisional license).  I dropped them off and came home to pick up Tiago and Javi.  We made it back with a few minutes to spare.  

After playing for primary and catching the rest of RS, I was a bit pooped.  I made everyone scrounge around for lunch and drew some pictures with Javi.  I get a bit sleepy so I curled up on the couch.  I have  a vague memory of Talia asking to go ice skating and her friend Robert coming in.  I wasn't even alert enough to pretend to be awake when she brought him into the house.  

Catching up--Part 1 of Many---HAWAII

When we knew Fernando was going to be deployed, I started figuring out how to pass the time so I didn't pass out as a mom.  I knew we wanted to visit family to help the kids have some family love coming from more than just me.  To achieve the multi-state travels, I planned on using our ability to fly on the military airplanes called Space-a or hops.

Quick overview:
The term Space-a is condensed for Space Available.  The military has various flights for loads of stuff and whatever space they have left over is open to military members and their family.  Each person/family is given a rank between 1 (totally gets on every time) to 6 (pray no one else shows up or that there are tons of seats).  We were a category 4 with Fernando's deployment status.  The flights are random and only published 72 hours out at a time.

We wanted to travel to California first to visit the Tovar side then head to my sister's house that happens to be a convenient 2 hours away from them.  Then drive (which I soon switched to fly because I am not a long distance driver) to Utah to visit my sister Angela and her new baby.  Finishing the tour would be a stay at my parents' house.

All these plans took a shuffle when I found out my sister was going to be on bed rest until she was able to safely go into labor on her own.  We tried numerous ways to make it anywhere close to Utah, but no go.  So, we went back to plan a.  The nice thing was that weather in Alaska was still pants and long sleeve weather.  I had our bags packed for weeks just ready to go whenever the flights showed up.  Still no flights were going from Alaska to California.

Then one fateful Sunday, a flight to Hawaii opened up.  It turns out that Hawaii has several flights a week going to various places in California.  I figured, stay in Hawaii a few days.  Enjoy the sunshine and the beach then take the first flight to California.  So the adventure begins.

We had a less than normal first time experience getting onto space-a.  Everyone who wanted to fly was able to get on board.  I had brought snacks for the flight and thought "we just ate lunch and the flight is only about 5 hours, so we won't need the meal."  WRONG.  I didn't understand that different airplanes are flown and some are significantly slower than commercial aircrafts.  The kids were starving, but luckily some nice people shared their boxed lunches that I should have ordered when we were getting our boarding passes.

What rocks and stinks about these flights is that the airplane is a free play zone.  We played red light green light in the middle of the plane, got to visit the cockpit to see the pilots, lay on the floor to watch movies, and wander as we pleased.  The stink is that the open ended opportunities are less appreciated than limited ones.  I confess I didn't plan well.  The flight seemed to drag on forever with its loud engine noises and windowless tomb like feeling.

We arrived in plenty of time for me to get our rental car except we weren't aloud to deplane for another hour and a half.  At this point, all of my kids passed out.  I had to wake everyone up which led to a scream fest and grumpy incapacity to help.  I felt so sorry for all my tired, starving kids.  By the time we got off, the rental car place on base was closed and same with all the food places.  The shuttle bus wouldn't allow for suitcases, and the taxi ride to our hotel was a steep $75.

I needed a moment to think.  We parked ourselves in the kid area that we would end up knowing quite well by the time we left and I worked the options.  End result was to take a taxi to the airport car rental area, get a sort of over priced deal with all the airport fees and taxes, but make it to the Hale Koa in time to sleep at a ridiculous hour.

Next morning wiped out all the stresses of the day before.  Nothing like an all you can eat breakfast looking out to the ocean, a chance to swim in a pool next to the ocean (I would never go into the water in Waikiki), and off to our next hotel at Bellows beach.  The trick with space-a is that you never know when you are flying out so you never know how long to have your car rental and hotel space.  I figured we'd stay until Wednesday and then easily catch a flight to California.  I scheduled hotels and rental cars accordingly.

The kids wanted to play at the beach, spend a day at the Polynesian Cultural Center, and beach some more.  Sounded perfect to me.  I was amazed at my stamina.  I swear I couldn't do all the activities and driving with no naps and pretty rough sleep.  I felt like I was being magnified and then some.  Here are some of the photos from that trips

Climb California!!

  Once in California, we prepared for some rock climbing.

First we went climbing on the edge of the ocean... quite literally. The cliff's drop went strait into the Pacific. We climbed in our swim suits, as seen above of Tiago. 

   We headed over to the Mojave Desert to the Tovars home.  

Our Epic Family Adventure Part 1

Clear back in April, we decided to sign up for a chance to follow Fernando for a few months.  The logistics were a bit overwhelming.  We worked several different options including terminating out rental contract and putting our stuff in storage.  Fortuitously, some new neighbors moved in and we snagged a good deal of boxes to pack up our household goods.  In the end, the stress and timetable of the rental termination helped us decide to keep our contract and find friends willing to use the house while we were away. 

Though we tentatively decided to go through with the whole transient lifestyle, the deal was sealed when my Mom arranged for a few days of horseback riding at her cousin’s house in Wyoming.  The plan was now to visit Fernando’s family for a few weeks.  Fernando would head off to set things up for us (housing, car, etc) while we played in Utah with my family.  Then, when things were looking settled, we would make our way to Fernando.  All the while, we would do very basic homeschool to keep the kids’ brains active and functioning.    

During our final preparations, a few big problems decided to rear their ugly head.  All the flights seemed to disappear (common with Space-A) so we bought last minute plane tickets to California.  The weather started to get a little chilly (like pipes freezing/bursting cold) and we found out that our furnace was broken and the repair wouldn’t be completed until after we flew out.  On top of all that, Joaquin decided to play super hero off our wooden chest and damaged his foot.  The radiologist didn’t give us any hope for a positive outcome. 

Luckily, Joaquin’s foot seemed to heal (not 100% sure as the doctor seems to be, but that is what the xrays show).  Because the tickets were only one-way, it was relatively inexpensive.  Amazing friends went out of their way to be at our home to turn on water and space heaters, and open cabinets.  One dear friend noted that is was warmer in our garage than the house.  They took turns opening the house for the repairman who wouldn’t show up.  The furnace finally was fixed much to everyone’s delight.  We were on our way.  

Friday, September 27 at 10:30pm we arrived at the Anchorage International Airport.  Our dear neighbors dropped us off and helped us carry all 13 bags into the terminal.  We were flying JetBlue that only had the extra roomy seats available and should have charged us $40 a seat, but kindly let us upgrade for free. The flight took off at midnight, dropped us into Seattle 3 hours later.  Lay over was 1 hour (long enough for kiddos to really wake up and buy some overpriced breakfast) and then we had a 1 hour flight to Long Beach, CA.  It really put things into perspective how far Alaska is from the continental US.    

Funny side note, while watching the other passengers board the plane for Seattle, I couldn't help but notice the very similar attire and appearance.  Almost everyone who walked down the aisle had gauges in the ears, rings in strange places, dreaded hair, au natural hygiene and a mellow attitude.  The same could be said for boarding to LA except those items were replaced with perfectly coifed hair, immaculate makeup, lightly bronzed skin, and coordinated apparel, bags, jewelry, and shoes.  

Long Beach Airport was quaint.  We walked off the airplane onto the tarmac and enjoyed the palm trees in the open atrium between the terminal and the outdoor luggage claim.  To save time, I sent Fernando with Tiago and Talia to pick up the rental car and took Mia and Joaquin to snag the luggage.  Needless to say, it was quite a show.  I think most people expect a certain amount of luggage per person.  People stared incredulously after the 5th bag I pulled off the serpentine luggage claim.  I almost caused a crisis when the locked gun case loomed across the black belt.  The women in front of me, recoiled at the site.  One whispered loudly pulling as far as she could away from the tainted box "Is that a gun? That's totally a gun."  As if on cue, I hoisted it from the conveyor and set it next to Joaquin.  Even if I wanted to go on a shooting spree, the unloaded gun had two huge locks.  They could have easily escaped in the time I tried to open it.  Too bad, I don't even touch the gun Fernando purchased for me years ago.  The only guns I endorse for my use have lasers or paintballs.

With 12 bags (4 of which were significantly oversized and heavy), 1 carseat, plus about 4 carry ons, those little pay for luggage carts weren't going to cut it.  Luckily a kind skycap employee came to our rescue.  He even wandered around with us to find where Fernando went with the car.  We used some mad Tetris skills to fit everything.  Even still, bags were everywhere.  We stopped by Panera for some deliciousness, and Redondo Beach while we waited for Fernando's brother to land in LAX.

 The beach was beautiful.  I was honestly shocked.  Another funny side note, when we first planned to use a military hop to get to California, we thought we could take a detour through Hawaii.  It worked so well last year when Fernando was deployed.  Flights just kept disappearing or lacked enough seats.  After the third or fourth missed attempt, the kids postulated "The reason we can't get on a flight is because mom hasn't followed through with her promise to the missionaries to give a Book of Mormon to her friend."  It's true that I did promise the missionaries, but to be fair, I intentionally made it an open ended promise.  I love the Book of Mormon.  It has been a guide and strength to me and my family.  I think anyone who reads it seeking for meaning will gain from its inspired words.  I know that my friend, who already has years of exposure to the LDS faith, would accept it kindly.  It just felt unnatural and forced.  With my girls by my side, I conquered my fear.  To avoid awkward conversation that always flows from me while talking about the church, I decided to write my thoughts in the front pages and gave her scripture references to the pictures inside.  I gave it to her and even told her that we had missed going to Hawaii because I was supposed to give it to her.  She laughed.  When I made it to the beach, I forwarded her the picture and thanked her for accepting the book so we could visit the beach.

After we picked up Fernando's brother, we stopped by the LA Temple to pick up some items.  Tiago found this crazy husk and was being hilarious with it.

 The two hour drive to the Tovar's home proved a bit too long.  California post up next.

Catch up list vs Conference list

While there is a lot that has happened in the past year
*deployment
*military hops to Hawaii with beaches and burns and sleeping on a terminal floor and a flight to California with crazy connections to get to family
*Utah fun and then a day trip back to California to hop on a military flight back to Alaska
*family visits
*Kindergarten with a first day fiasco
*beautiful long Alaskan fall
*Complete house rearrangement including moving sofas up and downstairs solo
*return from Deployment
*holidays and birthdays
*Hosted my 2nd Turkey Trot
*dog sledding
*Baptism
*Callings and Releases
*Ice Fishing
*Snowboarding/skiing
*Ice Festival

I think today I will start with gratitude for General Conference.  I really resonated with almost every talk which hardly happens for me.  I felt strengthened and chastised in the most loving way.  I nearly fell out of my chair laughing when Elder Bednar shared a story of a man trying to convince his wife of the necessity of a 4WD truck for emergent milk runs in snow storms.  I don't want a truck, but have told Fernando that if our Alaskan stay is more permanent than the one year we are set to have--I NEED a 4WD vehicle to help prevent all of the times our minivan has become stuck in snow even with snow tires.

The kids were great.  I can't begin to tell you have lucky I feel to have found that blog post (pre-pinterest days) to have gifts per Apostle who would speak.  Even though I have been doing it for years, I still wait until the very last minute possible to decide what to do.  Thank heavens for Talia's birthday party coming up.  Many of the activities were for the sole purpose of assembling the parts of the goodie bags the kids would receive.  (I have serious issues with just putting in candy that I don't even let my kids eat.)  So the night before conference, I headed to Walmart to wander the aisles in search of possible activities.  My list this year:
1-3 Puzzles (I meant to have this just be for one talk, but I ran out of ideas)
4-painting bird houses
5-Yarn balls (for a snowman corn hole-like party game) which turned into Pikachu balls
6- Elsa ribbon dolls and "Olaf" snowman ribbon dolls for pen toppers
7-Sven and Elsa foam head dress 
8-Playdough
9-3D Snowflakes (which was an epic failure. . .every time I cut it wrong)
10-Easter egg (didn't attempt.  The yarn balls were a bit too exciting and I was glad not to start this mess)
11- Easter Egg II  (also was grateful not to have to attempt this feat.  What was I thinking?)
12-Melting Beads which turned into Joaquin scooping and dumping all over the place
13-Picture of the Salt Lake City Temple with legos to make a small scale version
14-Ballon Animal Maker (again, what was I thinking?  Thankfully, the Elder Oaks spoke at the Priesthood Session  because that would have been a noisy, frustrating experience)

We also had note pages that the kids were supposed to use to write down their thoughts and impressions they had during each Apostle or Prophet's talk.  Bingo cards and a word search were waiting for them as well.  Over all it was very successful and now I have Talia's party pretty much ready for next weekend.

Talia Bought Her First Set of Wheels

Talia has been constantly asking for a new bike.  We sold her bikes when we moved from San Antonio because she just grew too fast.  After watching Mia and Tiago pick up the ability to bike ride so fast and on their own because of their scooters, I was really hoping we could have the same success with Talia.  Mia and Tiago literally walked up to some kid's bike and hopped on and took off.  No assisting the kid while they wiggle on their training wheel-less bike and build the kid's confidence and then letting go as you cheer.  Just watching as they speed by on a bike you don't really know who it belongs to.

Fast forward to the other day when I saw a bike for sale from some local person for $10.  Talia used her birthday money and purchased the pink wonder.  I told her she could get training wheels, but suggested that if she really wanted to learn to ride, training wheels would just set her back.  I hate that the training wheels are always making kids lean to the side!  She agree reluctantly.  When we first tried, she was terrified, which made me regret the pep talk about the ability to learn without the training wheels.  But she persisted mainly because I told her that she could either try to learn or forget about it and on ride her scooter.  A few minutes later we had this:

She rode around for hours.  Everyday she can't wait to get out to ride.  Another funny aside which made me feel kind of good was that her friends came to ask me to teach them how to ride their bikes.  To be fair, the whole learning to ride the bike is totally up to the kid.  I think the parent is just there to pick up the kid and encourage them to figure it out.  I found out that Talia had been watching the friend's mom try to teach her when Talia interrupted with "you really should have my mom teach you.  She is the best teacher."  So even though I didn't get to teach my two oldest, at least I had the chance to do the whole stereotypical bike learning moment with a neighbor's kid.  I even ran down the block with her yelling "your doing it!  That's all you!"  Good work out.  Great feeling.